Hello world,
I'm bloated and crabby. WHY AM I FATTER!!!!!! I hate being a girl.
ugh.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
February 26th, 2010
My message is brief,
Sometimes I just want to pour my corn flakes into my peanut butter jar and eat it with a spoon.
That is all.
Sometimes I just want to pour my corn flakes into my peanut butter jar and eat it with a spoon.
That is all.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
February 18th, 2010
This just in:
new tattoo want; "If everybody's not a beauty, than nobody is." written in some beautiful artsy text on the waist line of my pants on the front side of my body. I don't want it to say -Andy Warhol because I already know that he said it and I don't want there to be too much evidence of my love for him on my body. I want this quote to be there especially because I've struggled with my self image for awhile now. From throwing up to starving myself to only eating oatmeal for X amount of days, I obviously had a problem with my vision of me. I really feel like I've overcome this recently and I'm thankful. I'm overall happy with myself lately and thank goodness.
SO I think this tattoo would be appropriate; not because I think i'm not beautiful, but because every person on this planet has a beautiful feature or physical trait. If everyone doesn't anymore, than no one should.
ANDY WARHOL, YOU'VE GOT ME AGAIN! =)
new tattoo want; "If everybody's not a beauty, than nobody is." written in some beautiful artsy text on the waist line of my pants on the front side of my body. I don't want it to say -Andy Warhol because I already know that he said it and I don't want there to be too much evidence of my love for him on my body. I want this quote to be there especially because I've struggled with my self image for awhile now. From throwing up to starving myself to only eating oatmeal for X amount of days, I obviously had a problem with my vision of me. I really feel like I've overcome this recently and I'm thankful. I'm overall happy with myself lately and thank goodness.
SO I think this tattoo would be appropriate; not because I think i'm not beautiful, but because every person on this planet has a beautiful feature or physical trait. If everyone doesn't anymore, than no one should.
ANDY WARHOL, YOU'VE GOT ME AGAIN! =)
PORTFOLIO REVIEW ESSAY
Melissa Martin
Portfolio Review Statement
“Art, to me, is an expression of true feelings and soul. It is created without the worry of other people’s judgments or opinions. It is a composition of an artist’s strengths and abilities, creating something from nothing. It gives viewers the opportunity to see the world through the eyes of another person;
the world from an artist’s point of view.”
–Melissa Martin
The roles of the artist in society and culture are endless. An artist creates art for themselves and others, which helps shape society and defines our culture. I believe that art has done this for thousands of years and will never be put to an end. Artists open the eyes of hundreds and thousands of people who view their work. It enables viewers to see a side of the world that they may not have seen before. Through the use of color, space, subject, and altogether composition it is possible to view any feeling, idea, or emotion we can imagine. Artists create positive learning atmospheres, beautiful artworks, and pathways to imagination. Similarly to the artist, art creates and ignites imagination as well. Without this in our society the world would almost completely lack life and pure creativity. Art does not have a defined purpose or function in our world; but rather is required for the development of our culture.
I wouldn’t say that I intentionally let art play a part in my life instead I would say that it manages to sneak into everything I do. By this I mean that it has always come naturally to me. It was not until I was in high school that I realized how my love of art changed my perspective of the world around me. I am extremely aware of my surroundings because of the passion I retain. My senses are heightened thanks to my awareness! More or less, art gives meaning to almost every action I perform.
Art does not merely play a role in my life it truly fulfills who I am and what I want to be. Since I was around thirteen years old my friends have told me that I would make a great art teacher. When I was that young I would respond with a simple “thanks” but never took it into account. Like many young artists I wanted an exciting, fast paced, edgy, and eccentric job as an artist in New York or Chicago. Unfortunately, when I entered high school there was a dramatic shift in my family and life at home. I had many unwanted feelings and did not know what to do about them. To cope with these events I turned to the art department at my school and became extremely involved with the program there. There I built the knowledge, skill, and confidence that I needed to pursue my dreams of becoming a developed artist. My senior year in high school came and went, the entire time my only hope was to become a high school art teacher following my years spent at college. Freshman year I finished my foundation art classes with no problems and went on in my second year expecting to pass the portfolio review and enter into the art education program. My senior year I would have been ecstatic about reaching this point in my life, but this time last semester I was minimally excited for something I’ve been waiting for for so long. I had my review and discussed my dreams about becoming an art teacher who would help young artists develop. My essay explained that I wanted to show students how to be successful, intelligent young people in the art world. With this being said, words on a page and actual dialogue can be very different things. The more the interviewers asked me about my work, how I developed my pieces, and my opinions on art, the more they saw that I’ve completely dedicated myself to my work. I am, without a doubt, completely in love with creating paintings and drawings for my own personal satisfaction rather than just finishing an assignment for class. Of course, I had an understanding of this before walking in for the interview, but it was never apparent to me the amount of time I would be losing in Kiehle after finishing my foundation classes. Not only that, but the amount of time I would be losing to create art as a high school teacher following a curriculum. I realized soon after this discussion that this is not a possibility for me. Perhaps, someday in the future I can get my teaching degree if that’s what I still dream of. As of now, I would like to stay grounded in the art department and continue to grow as an artist. The limitations for what we can accomplish as students are endless right now, and forever. A small push was all that I needed to understand what I truly wanted out of my college experience, but it was found. My goals as of last semester are to leave St. Cloud with my BFA in painting and continue on to get my master’s degree. To be even a minimally recognized artist would be incredible, but to move on to greater places than Minnesota is what I adamantly would love to accomplish.
I am truly passionate about creating art. I believe that it is a gateway for other people to see the world through another person’s eyes and mind. I often catch myself thinking that a painting is like a Polaroid photo taken with the mind but developed on canvas. There is nothing about creating art that sounds harmful or restrictive; it is relieving, therapeutic, and full of soul. I’d like viewers to see what I see through my artwork. Ordinary objects should be appreciated and human expressions are endless; that’s what I try to convey through my own artwork. It is often taken for granted how many normal objects and human abilities there actually are in this world and I would like to make some of these objects and functions made known to the people who view my work.
Art means more to me than words can express.
I wish that with this education came a guarantee for what lies ahead of me. Unfortunately, the future is a difficult thing to predict. It can be erased in a second or changed in five minutes. Nonetheless I would like to think I am without a doubt on the right track for a future I will love; whether it is in the next year or the rest of my life. The goals I would like to accomplish following the near future consist of achieving all A’s in my classes, getting some of my general education classes out of the way this summer, and in the long run, attending MCAD following graduation to obtain my master’s degree. I feel that maybe one of these goals is aiming high but I’m willing to put all of my effort into this. As for my personal goals towards my artwork, I would like to become more confident in oil painting. Although I have become more comfortable with it since this time last semester, I am by no means fearless with my use of it. My knowledge of oil paint, the marks it makes, and the consistencies it can achieve are hardly developed, but I’m learning. In addition to this I would also like to be able to branch out from my realistic style and explore other types of drawing and painting. Realistic artwork is nice, but sometimes, although I greatly appreciate having the skills that I do possess, it would be nice to be able to be skilled in more than one genre of a medium.
I wrote the caption at the beginning of my statement to describe the word “art” after receiving an assignment in my art 198 class to define an abstract term. Most of the other students chose to define very generic words like love, happiness, or sadness. Of course all of these would be difficult to define, but the word “art” was especially hard for me. Up until that class I had never thought about my own definition of the word “art” or even cared really. All I knew was that I liked to paint and draw and I didn’t think I ever had to have a meaning or reason to create anything. But, the more I thought about what the word meant, the more I realized why I love it. Painting is not merely a fun activity for me anymore; it’s a very significant part of my life that I intend never to lose sight of. Art has opened my eyes to new perspectives, new situations, and new friends. My first year as an art major has developed my knowledge and understanding of art. It has matured my thinking from an unsure high school student to a confident college student who is always looking for more information. I strongly and eagerly look forward to continuing my education so that I may become a strong artist and painter myself someday. I would like the world to have the ability to see another world, the one I see through my eyes.
wish me luck =)
Portfolio Review Statement
“Art, to me, is an expression of true feelings and soul. It is created without the worry of other people’s judgments or opinions. It is a composition of an artist’s strengths and abilities, creating something from nothing. It gives viewers the opportunity to see the world through the eyes of another person;
the world from an artist’s point of view.”
–Melissa Martin
The roles of the artist in society and culture are endless. An artist creates art for themselves and others, which helps shape society and defines our culture. I believe that art has done this for thousands of years and will never be put to an end. Artists open the eyes of hundreds and thousands of people who view their work. It enables viewers to see a side of the world that they may not have seen before. Through the use of color, space, subject, and altogether composition it is possible to view any feeling, idea, or emotion we can imagine. Artists create positive learning atmospheres, beautiful artworks, and pathways to imagination. Similarly to the artist, art creates and ignites imagination as well. Without this in our society the world would almost completely lack life and pure creativity. Art does not have a defined purpose or function in our world; but rather is required for the development of our culture.
I wouldn’t say that I intentionally let art play a part in my life instead I would say that it manages to sneak into everything I do. By this I mean that it has always come naturally to me. It was not until I was in high school that I realized how my love of art changed my perspective of the world around me. I am extremely aware of my surroundings because of the passion I retain. My senses are heightened thanks to my awareness! More or less, art gives meaning to almost every action I perform.
Art does not merely play a role in my life it truly fulfills who I am and what I want to be. Since I was around thirteen years old my friends have told me that I would make a great art teacher. When I was that young I would respond with a simple “thanks” but never took it into account. Like many young artists I wanted an exciting, fast paced, edgy, and eccentric job as an artist in New York or Chicago. Unfortunately, when I entered high school there was a dramatic shift in my family and life at home. I had many unwanted feelings and did not know what to do about them. To cope with these events I turned to the art department at my school and became extremely involved with the program there. There I built the knowledge, skill, and confidence that I needed to pursue my dreams of becoming a developed artist. My senior year in high school came and went, the entire time my only hope was to become a high school art teacher following my years spent at college. Freshman year I finished my foundation art classes with no problems and went on in my second year expecting to pass the portfolio review and enter into the art education program. My senior year I would have been ecstatic about reaching this point in my life, but this time last semester I was minimally excited for something I’ve been waiting for for so long. I had my review and discussed my dreams about becoming an art teacher who would help young artists develop. My essay explained that I wanted to show students how to be successful, intelligent young people in the art world. With this being said, words on a page and actual dialogue can be very different things. The more the interviewers asked me about my work, how I developed my pieces, and my opinions on art, the more they saw that I’ve completely dedicated myself to my work. I am, without a doubt, completely in love with creating paintings and drawings for my own personal satisfaction rather than just finishing an assignment for class. Of course, I had an understanding of this before walking in for the interview, but it was never apparent to me the amount of time I would be losing in Kiehle after finishing my foundation classes. Not only that, but the amount of time I would be losing to create art as a high school teacher following a curriculum. I realized soon after this discussion that this is not a possibility for me. Perhaps, someday in the future I can get my teaching degree if that’s what I still dream of. As of now, I would like to stay grounded in the art department and continue to grow as an artist. The limitations for what we can accomplish as students are endless right now, and forever. A small push was all that I needed to understand what I truly wanted out of my college experience, but it was found. My goals as of last semester are to leave St. Cloud with my BFA in painting and continue on to get my master’s degree. To be even a minimally recognized artist would be incredible, but to move on to greater places than Minnesota is what I adamantly would love to accomplish.
I am truly passionate about creating art. I believe that it is a gateway for other people to see the world through another person’s eyes and mind. I often catch myself thinking that a painting is like a Polaroid photo taken with the mind but developed on canvas. There is nothing about creating art that sounds harmful or restrictive; it is relieving, therapeutic, and full of soul. I’d like viewers to see what I see through my artwork. Ordinary objects should be appreciated and human expressions are endless; that’s what I try to convey through my own artwork. It is often taken for granted how many normal objects and human abilities there actually are in this world and I would like to make some of these objects and functions made known to the people who view my work.
Art means more to me than words can express.
I wish that with this education came a guarantee for what lies ahead of me. Unfortunately, the future is a difficult thing to predict. It can be erased in a second or changed in five minutes. Nonetheless I would like to think I am without a doubt on the right track for a future I will love; whether it is in the next year or the rest of my life. The goals I would like to accomplish following the near future consist of achieving all A’s in my classes, getting some of my general education classes out of the way this summer, and in the long run, attending MCAD following graduation to obtain my master’s degree. I feel that maybe one of these goals is aiming high but I’m willing to put all of my effort into this. As for my personal goals towards my artwork, I would like to become more confident in oil painting. Although I have become more comfortable with it since this time last semester, I am by no means fearless with my use of it. My knowledge of oil paint, the marks it makes, and the consistencies it can achieve are hardly developed, but I’m learning. In addition to this I would also like to be able to branch out from my realistic style and explore other types of drawing and painting. Realistic artwork is nice, but sometimes, although I greatly appreciate having the skills that I do possess, it would be nice to be able to be skilled in more than one genre of a medium.
I wrote the caption at the beginning of my statement to describe the word “art” after receiving an assignment in my art 198 class to define an abstract term. Most of the other students chose to define very generic words like love, happiness, or sadness. Of course all of these would be difficult to define, but the word “art” was especially hard for me. Up until that class I had never thought about my own definition of the word “art” or even cared really. All I knew was that I liked to paint and draw and I didn’t think I ever had to have a meaning or reason to create anything. But, the more I thought about what the word meant, the more I realized why I love it. Painting is not merely a fun activity for me anymore; it’s a very significant part of my life that I intend never to lose sight of. Art has opened my eyes to new perspectives, new situations, and new friends. My first year as an art major has developed my knowledge and understanding of art. It has matured my thinking from an unsure high school student to a confident college student who is always looking for more information. I strongly and eagerly look forward to continuing my education so that I may become a strong artist and painter myself someday. I would like the world to have the ability to see another world, the one I see through my eyes.
wish me luck =)
February 17th, 2010
Happy Ash Wednesday everyone!
I'm giving up chocolate. Don't let me forget.
So anyway, I got a phone call last night and my plans are ONNN and someone is in for a pretty good spring break. =) (hint: it's me)
The only thing that hasn't been good today is my food choice. I've been in the art building all day and this is what I've eaten: FOUR, count em, FOUR pop tarts. okay, not four packages of them but four individual tarts. yuck, i feel disgusting. i'm going for a major run tonight and then back to my apartment to do some more laundry, watch some movies, and go over my portfolio review essay a few more thousand times.
i haven't blogged about my life completely for awhile so here i go. this'll be a long one. NEXT ON TOPIC: my health. i started taking meds for my extreme lack of iron and my elevated thyroid last week. everyday my body is adjusting differently and it's driving me nuts. not to be gross any guy that's reading this, but i don't know where else to get this out there. i've been taking my thyroid pill in the morning, iron in the afternoon, and my BC before i go to bed. I'm a week and a half into my BC now and guess what i got on monday night.
WHAAAAAT!? why?! this is like a mean joke my body is pulling on me. it's probably saying something like "aha, melissa gets cramps twice in one month!" jerk ovaries... wtf. so anyway, i'm pissed about this. i feel bloated and i'm getting cramps and i'm moody and emotional just like i would be during that last week. NO THANKS! i'm insanely annoyed about it. hopefully it's almost gone now. goddamn.
okay, subject change. i know that i've talked about this guy a few times in the past month or months or whatevskies, but i don't feel like it's just a little crush anymore. i mean i'm saying i really like him. a lot. enough to make him a painting you guys... and thats not something i do for anyone unless it's a class assignment and it means nothing to me. well, this wasn't a class assignment at all- it was actually something i spent a lot of time on! SIGH so anyway, dear boy i like who lives far away. i have something in store for you soon that you don't know about. how do you like that. =) i know i keep telling you i'll stop bothering you about it, but i don't honestly want to. please move home and date me you jerk! ha, you're not a jerk. but seriously, i want to be with you. not because of me wanting others to know i'm unavailable and not so that i can change my relationship status on facebook. so that i know that i'm for you and you're for me and that's that.
ALSO ALSO ALSO my portfolio review is coming up again. i just finished my essay and i'll post it as "Portfolio Review" after i'm done with this blog.
thanks for listening internet, you always cheer me up. =)
I'm giving up chocolate. Don't let me forget.
So anyway, I got a phone call last night and my plans are ONNN and someone is in for a pretty good spring break. =) (hint: it's me)
The only thing that hasn't been good today is my food choice. I've been in the art building all day and this is what I've eaten: FOUR, count em, FOUR pop tarts. okay, not four packages of them but four individual tarts. yuck, i feel disgusting. i'm going for a major run tonight and then back to my apartment to do some more laundry, watch some movies, and go over my portfolio review essay a few more thousand times.
i haven't blogged about my life completely for awhile so here i go. this'll be a long one. NEXT ON TOPIC: my health. i started taking meds for my extreme lack of iron and my elevated thyroid last week. everyday my body is adjusting differently and it's driving me nuts. not to be gross any guy that's reading this, but i don't know where else to get this out there. i've been taking my thyroid pill in the morning, iron in the afternoon, and my BC before i go to bed. I'm a week and a half into my BC now and guess what i got on monday night.
WHAAAAAT!? why?! this is like a mean joke my body is pulling on me. it's probably saying something like "aha, melissa gets cramps twice in one month!" jerk ovaries... wtf. so anyway, i'm pissed about this. i feel bloated and i'm getting cramps and i'm moody and emotional just like i would be during that last week. NO THANKS! i'm insanely annoyed about it. hopefully it's almost gone now. goddamn.
okay, subject change. i know that i've talked about this guy a few times in the past month or months or whatevskies, but i don't feel like it's just a little crush anymore. i mean i'm saying i really like him. a lot. enough to make him a painting you guys... and thats not something i do for anyone unless it's a class assignment and it means nothing to me. well, this wasn't a class assignment at all- it was actually something i spent a lot of time on! SIGH so anyway, dear boy i like who lives far away. i have something in store for you soon that you don't know about. how do you like that. =) i know i keep telling you i'll stop bothering you about it, but i don't honestly want to. please move home and date me you jerk! ha, you're not a jerk. but seriously, i want to be with you. not because of me wanting others to know i'm unavailable and not so that i can change my relationship status on facebook. so that i know that i'm for you and you're for me and that's that.
ALSO ALSO ALSO my portfolio review is coming up again. i just finished my essay and i'll post it as "Portfolio Review" after i'm done with this blog.
thanks for listening internet, you always cheer me up. =)
Thursday, February 11, 2010
february 12th, 2010
I feel like it's really still February 11th, but oh well.
I only have one message for this date...
Dear chocolate valentine's fish that was meant as a silly joke for my boy,
You are not meant to be eaten in one sitting, unless of course the boy doesn't come home for Valentine's Day. That it is 100% acceptable.
That is all!
I only have one message for this date...
Dear chocolate valentine's fish that was meant as a silly joke for my boy,
You are not meant to be eaten in one sitting, unless of course the boy doesn't come home for Valentine's Day. That it is 100% acceptable.
That is all!
February 11th, 2010
K, I'm bummed. Forreal.
The boy can't come home for Valentine's Day weekend. I understand this; tried to get home last weekend and didn't and can't get off work this weekend. Totally not his fault at all. Except that he should have asked off for this weekend instead of last! Another Valentine's Day alone... FAIL. Now I'm going to switch off between my tiny bedroom watching movies and laying in bed with his lightly boy-smelled tshirt only to turn to my even smaller studio where I'll probably listen to sad music, paint, and feel bad that no one will ever commit to being with me.
I'm going to go ahead and feel REAL sorry for myself now.
I know that he lives far away and has had bad past relationships, but hey guy, I'm NOT your old relationship! If I'm bugging you it's only because I have no idea what you're doing with this. You're not the only one who's had bad past relationships bucko! You're pretty much my other half so far! Unless I'm just having my head played with? But, if you want to be friends, say "let's just be friends" and if you want to be with me say this:
"Melissa, you mean a lot to me even though I can't see you every day. I like you and I don't want you to get snatched up by some other boy. Please be with me!"
guess what I'd say...
"OKAY!"
good lord.
I asked off for this weekend; he doesn't know.
The boy can't come home for Valentine's Day weekend. I understand this; tried to get home last weekend and didn't and can't get off work this weekend. Totally not his fault at all. Except that he should have asked off for this weekend instead of last! Another Valentine's Day alone... FAIL. Now I'm going to switch off between my tiny bedroom watching movies and laying in bed with his lightly boy-smelled tshirt only to turn to my even smaller studio where I'll probably listen to sad music, paint, and feel bad that no one will ever commit to being with me.
I'm going to go ahead and feel REAL sorry for myself now.
I know that he lives far away and has had bad past relationships, but hey guy, I'm NOT your old relationship! If I'm bugging you it's only because I have no idea what you're doing with this. You're not the only one who's had bad past relationships bucko! You're pretty much my other half so far! Unless I'm just having my head played with? But, if you want to be friends, say "let's just be friends" and if you want to be with me say this:
"Melissa, you mean a lot to me even though I can't see you every day. I like you and I don't want you to get snatched up by some other boy. Please be with me!"
guess what I'd say...
"OKAY!"
good lord.
I asked off for this weekend; he doesn't know.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
February 9th, 2010
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!
I haven't blogged for awhile. I've been busy disliking almost everything that's happening in my life. Anemia? Thyroids!? No more student loans!!?? Weight gain!!!! No, I don't know if I"m gaining that much weight really, but it sure feels like it. I am trying to figure out how to be as small as I used to be, not like I'm huge now or anything. It's just a goal of mine. ALSO attention all boys who know I don't appreciate them as more than a friend, which is all boys except one, PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE! I don't like you, I don't care about your opinion of me or who I like, and I don't want to get drunk and snuggle up with you; ever. Peace out men except one who actually doesn't suck.
That's all for now.
1
Except I took a picture of how I feel my face has blown up like a balloon I hope it's the lighting. BLEH! It's probably just me, I hope. But seriously, Brison on My Life As Liz is beautiful. OKAY that's really all =)
I haven't blogged for awhile. I've been busy disliking almost everything that's happening in my life. Anemia? Thyroids!? No more student loans!!?? Weight gain!!!! No, I don't know if I"m gaining that much weight really, but it sure feels like it. I am trying to figure out how to be as small as I used to be, not like I'm huge now or anything. It's just a goal of mine. ALSO attention all boys who know I don't appreciate them as more than a friend, which is all boys except one, PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE! I don't like you, I don't care about your opinion of me or who I like, and I don't want to get drunk and snuggle up with you; ever. Peace out men except one who actually doesn't suck.
That's all for now.
1Except I took a picture of how I feel my face has blown up like a balloon I hope it's the lighting. BLEH! It's probably just me, I hope. But seriously, Brison on My Life As Liz is beautiful. OKAY that's really all =)
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